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Monday, December 20, 2010

Vocational Rehabilitation Update

Fabulous day with UW Voc Rehab department.  I now feel a sense of hope and confidence that there may be work I CAN do.  I met with a wonderful woman who was kind and sincere.  She took some time to warm up the conversation with nice holiday talk and then proceeded to discuss WITH me my needs and wants.

After at least an hour of talking about my vocational history, medical history, and potential hurdles we created a workable plan of action.  First thing being first, I have nothing to wear to an interview.  She will reconnect me with the state DVR to assist with wardrobe and possible free computer training.  I am going to spend some time on my own laptop to get re-familiar with the basics.  I'll probably need to be re-tested on my computer skills...ugh.  I've never really been a computer "expert", but I do learn new tasks fairly easily (maybe I need a little more time now than in the past).

The ideal scene is for me to first land a part time job that has afternoon hours, that's not sales and in a low-stress setting.  I expressed that because of my fears of recurrence and difficulty working under high stress levels, it was really important that I work with/for people who actually like me.  It sounds so "grade school" but at the end of the day we spend 30% to 50% of our time on job related activities.  That being said, why would I want to spend my last few years in an environment that's really stressful or around negative people who don't like me.  I just don't want any part of it.

I am not going to compete with anyone for a CEO job, not now.  In the past, I had dreams of owning my own company and having a stable retirement.  I could still start a non-profit group that helps women with ovarian cancer, and I'm sure I will, but I can't do that without first being stable myself.  I am not planning on using my job to fulfill my social needs, I just don't want to work around a bunch of sharks.  I want to have the chance to enjoy work for once in my life  ;-)

When it's determined that I can handle part-time work, the goal is to progress to full-time work.  That could be either growing the current part-time to a full time, or getting a new full-time altogether.

All this will depend on how or when a cancer recurrence appears.

I let her know that ideally I want a job where I work from home. If I work from home and have flexibility with my projects, then if I have a recurrence, I can restructure my workload around chemo, etc.

If I don't get the ability to work from home, then I run the likelihood of losing my job every time I get a recurrence.  That I cannot bear, I just don't want to do that.  Can you imagine?  Our economy is really not in the best of health, as everyone knows, so the last thing I need is to have to find a new job every time I finish a chemo program.

Here's where I find myself wondering why I never got married. I always wanted to be married, but no guy ever wanted me that much, so I'm alone.  I have my mom, dad, sister, brother and aunt.  I have a few good friends.  But I am alone, for the sake of my personal life.  It would be so wonderful if I had a hubby who took care of me, but I don't.  So I will forge ahead and do the best I can.

That's a whole new area of depression, that I don't want to talk about right now.

Anyway, I'm on the right track.

Be Love

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