Today I was blessed with the opportunity to see the dentist through the Cancer Lifeline in Seattle. The program offers low cost or free dental care to cancer patients, who would otherwise not be able to receive dental care. I found out about the program through Survivor program with Lance Armstrong Foundation. I was so lucky. I had a cleaning, tooth fixed, simple x-rays and was treated with so much compassion. It was truly amazing.
I have only 4 cavities that need filled (one bad) and get to go back in March. I truly was expecting more cavities because it has been so long since I've been to the dentist.
Lot's of newer research can show correlation between dental health and overall health. Now that I'm NED, I need to do everything I can to treat my body well, and be "healthy". I never know what my life will really be.
Two of my OCA sisters are really struggling. Shopping Karma and Shades of Blue, please pray for them. Their painful struggle with cancer recurrence always gives me pause. Daria from Living with Cancer is also going through it and could use our prayerful thoughts.
Today I pause to remember my blessings.
I'm fielding prayers for mom. She will be starting dialysis sometime soon, and she is still absorbing it all. I will be here to do whatever it takes to make her happy. I have such a loving and caring family, and I know it'll all be OK.....it has to be.
Love.
Denise
CDC Symptom Diary Card
Friday, January 14, 2011
Friday, January 07, 2011
CA 125 now 12
Today I feel a little better. I just have to let go of expectations for my life. I really just want to help my family, that's all. I want to be able to take care of myself, that's all. I don't need to travel the world, I don't need to win a million dollars, I don't need to climb a mountain, I don't need to do anything spectacular.
I just want to feel love and give love.
My CA125 is rising slightly, now 12. The nurse said that the last time it was also 12, I thought it was 10. Confused a bit on that.
I am trying not to worry, under 30 is normal. But a slow steady rise is not comfortable. I just have to let it go, I have too many other things to take care of and I can't do anything about it anyway.
I just hate the feeling of instability.
I want to know where I'll be in six months or a year. I want to just have stability.
I sent my medcal appointment schedule to DVR today, and I meet with them again on the 24th of Feb for benefits meeting. That seems so far away.
My white counts are low again. It's getting time for a neulasta shot.........
Anyway,
Have a good weekend.
I just want to feel love and give love.
My CA125 is rising slightly, now 12. The nurse said that the last time it was also 12, I thought it was 10. Confused a bit on that.
I am trying not to worry, under 30 is normal. But a slow steady rise is not comfortable. I just have to let it go, I have too many other things to take care of and I can't do anything about it anyway.
I just hate the feeling of instability.
I want to know where I'll be in six months or a year. I want to just have stability.
I sent my medcal appointment schedule to DVR today, and I meet with them again on the 24th of Feb for benefits meeting. That seems so far away.
My white counts are low again. It's getting time for a neulasta shot.........
Anyway,
Have a good weekend.
Thursday, January 06, 2011
whatever
Pleasantly surprised to find that the seasons channel on cable is still playing Christmas music..yay. Anyway, I wanted to share up to dates on health, work progress, help needed, etc. My body feels "OK" and I think the new supplements and cantelope are helping my belly. My nausea is not as strong, still every day, but more manageable.......which gives me great hope.
First, since I've been battling cold with strong cough, I had to reschedule the psyche appointment. I hope to see them this month. I really do need at least one visit, especially after I finsih telling you about my appointment with voc rehab.
Second, went for CA125 lab and port flush yesterday. I asked them to pull a CBC because it's time to get my WBC counts..........so we'll see. I'll know all that in a few days.
Third, I see the breast nurse practitiioner at end of month for thorough breast exam....for BRCA1 mutation maintenance. Let's hope all goes well and no lumps please.
Fourth, voc rehab is driving me crazy. I met with "G", nice enough young man. He claims he never received my medical records until lately. But after I asked him to look, they were stamped as having been received by end of October. WHEN IM MET WITH THE FIRST PERSON IN EARLY OCTOBER, I SAID I HAD RESOURCES TIL END OF JANUARY, THEN THAT WAS IT.
Well, here we are and the next step is for me to do a community based trial work for 2-3 weeks, unpaid.
The want to see if I' ready to return to work. The problem is that "G: didn't even know what skills I had or anything. Plus, I already said that going back to my original type of work was bad because my arthritis is worse since my cancer. I can do spurts of things, like wash car, or clean room, or move small piece of furniture......but working 8 hours per day filing or typing is way different. I need a new career!!!!!!!!!!!
ASSUMING I LIVE long enough to graduate!
I hate these people. They have it all backwards and are not geared for cancer patients. I only earn 626 per month on disability. I just need a fricken part time job that won't kill me, and have that for a bit to build up my tolerance. Then I want to do some training to see about working at home!!!!!!!!!!!!
If I go back on chemo, which I probably will have a recurrence, than I can work from home.
Why is this so hard to understand?????????????????????????????????????????
Plus mom wants me to move out soon, she will be starting some serious health treatments and would prefer to be alone. I can understand that, but she'll need some help.....
I just don't understand why she won't just let me help for a while when I'm working part time, so that I'm there in case she needs someone and I'm then able to build up residual to move out.
No, now I don't know what I'm going to do. I'll keep looking for part time work along with the millions of other people.............I hate this fucking disease. Meanwhile the bitch who misdiagnosed me is earning a healthy stocky MD figure living the high life. Fuck her.
Lost
First, since I've been battling cold with strong cough, I had to reschedule the psyche appointment. I hope to see them this month. I really do need at least one visit, especially after I finsih telling you about my appointment with voc rehab.
Second, went for CA125 lab and port flush yesterday. I asked them to pull a CBC because it's time to get my WBC counts..........so we'll see. I'll know all that in a few days.
Third, I see the breast nurse practitiioner at end of month for thorough breast exam....for BRCA1 mutation maintenance. Let's hope all goes well and no lumps please.
Fourth, voc rehab is driving me crazy. I met with "G", nice enough young man. He claims he never received my medical records until lately. But after I asked him to look, they were stamped as having been received by end of October. WHEN IM MET WITH THE FIRST PERSON IN EARLY OCTOBER, I SAID I HAD RESOURCES TIL END OF JANUARY, THEN THAT WAS IT.
Well, here we are and the next step is for me to do a community based trial work for 2-3 weeks, unpaid.
The want to see if I' ready to return to work. The problem is that "G: didn't even know what skills I had or anything. Plus, I already said that going back to my original type of work was bad because my arthritis is worse since my cancer. I can do spurts of things, like wash car, or clean room, or move small piece of furniture......but working 8 hours per day filing or typing is way different. I need a new career!!!!!!!!!!!
ASSUMING I LIVE long enough to graduate!
I hate these people. They have it all backwards and are not geared for cancer patients. I only earn 626 per month on disability. I just need a fricken part time job that won't kill me, and have that for a bit to build up my tolerance. Then I want to do some training to see about working at home!!!!!!!!!!!!
If I go back on chemo, which I probably will have a recurrence, than I can work from home.
Why is this so hard to understand?????????????????????????????????????????
Plus mom wants me to move out soon, she will be starting some serious health treatments and would prefer to be alone. I can understand that, but she'll need some help.....
I just don't understand why she won't just let me help for a while when I'm working part time, so that I'm there in case she needs someone and I'm then able to build up residual to move out.
No, now I don't know what I'm going to do. I'll keep looking for part time work along with the millions of other people.............I hate this fucking disease. Meanwhile the bitch who misdiagnosed me is earning a healthy stocky MD figure living the high life. Fuck her.
Lost
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