contradictions

Well, as government goes, government does what it can. I called my congressman's office and they said to call my state assemblyman. My state assemblyman's office said to call my congressman if the Dept of Managed Care help center is not able to "help". So, because insurance portability, or lack thereof, is controlled by both State and Federal statutes, per "them", nobody is really willing to go out on a ledge for me. The gentlemen I spoke with today were all very concerned and felt bad, and I could tell they were sincere. At least there is motion.

I had the pleasure of speaking with Philip today (an old good friend) and he recommended I call the California Dept of Insurance. So that is on my list for tomorrow, before my doctor appointment. It was so nice to talk with him today. It's amazing how we all can make a difference with kindness and care. Thank you Philip for your prayers and I am so happy that your life is full of joy. I have Philip to thank for bringing me closer to God, and for that I am forever grateful. I feel lost without a constant communication with God.

He is there if we want to feel his love. I believe everyone needs to come to their terms with God and it comes from within each of us to open up and listen. We all do this at our own pace. Philip was there to lift me up a bit. Thank you Philip.

As far as my health goes, today was a day of more abdominal pain than usual, so making calls was tiresome. It takes a tremendous amount of energy to look for files, keep notes, log medications, log symptoms, and sort through this maze of potential resources. I really don't want to have to do this, but I need to do it. I need to get this monstrous health insurance debacle cleaned up.

I guess I'm hoping that this pain will ease soon. That's all.

Tomorrow I hope my primary doctor can help me find resources. Then Thursday is the bone marrow biopsy. I know it will hurt, but I'll get through it. I'll beg for lots of lidocaine.

Hugs and kisses and smiles and well wishes to all my friends and family. Thank you God for protecting those I love and for bringing good people into my life.

Denise