hotel move sigh

On this day I am being temporarily moved to a hotel because my roommate/Landlord has friends in from out of town. He "appreciates" us moving out of the house for a few days so that they can have fun and not be around a "sick" person. My other roommate is not tolerating my digestive challenges well either. Sorry, grow up.

I read my operative and post-op pathology report. After literally moving all my organs around and removing multiple tumors, total radical hysterectomy and appendectomy, my digestion is a bit "off'. I am doing the best I can. I am trying to wean off the pain pills.

The Residence Inn at Folsom was kind enough to give us a major discount because of my condition. Yeah!

So aside from the depression creeping up on me because I'll be losing all of my identity as I know it, I am doing the best I can to stay positive. I had a burst of anger last night though. I don't want to go through this. I don't want to have to move, file bankruptcy, go through chemo. I just want to be well. I want to live in a positive and stress free environment. I want my independence. I want to dance again.

Going through this with no husband is going to be hard. I just pray that God is going to really help my family because I am not dealing well emotionally and am very angry at my doctors for missing this. I'll get to "forgiveness" one day, but not now.

Hello

My name is Denise and I have Ovarian Cancer. Unfortunately in spite of having medical care for the past two years and good insurance, my doctors missed it! I have Stage III C OC and am still in shock. I am recovering from major abdominal surgery to include a total radical hysterectomy and appendectomy. My surgeon had to leave just a couple tumors less than .5cm. I am grateful for my surgeon and for the thorough work he did to optimally debulk my abdomen. Now I face upcoming chemo via both intravenous and abdominal catheterizing. I am devastated.

Prior to this news, I was barely getting by as a working disabled female adult. I was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis at age 15, nobody has ever loved me enough to want to marry me and I currently can only afford $600 room rental in a home. I have not had my own apartment since 1995 because I have been unable to afford such luxuries. Now I will lose everything again. I am hoping that as time goes by and as my chemotherapy or appropriate cancer treatment takes place, I can find new friends.

My family is either in Seattle, Denver or San Pedro. I am all alone except for just a few good friends in Folsom. My family does not have the money to travel back and forth and my insurance does not cover out of Northern California. We are still trying to figure out what to do. My oncologist says that I cannot go through chemo without family. What am I going to do?

For now I just want to thank my family, especially Mandy, Mom and Aunt Deb for coming to Folsom and helping me recover from my surgery.

I know God has a plan for me and I am hoping first and foremost that any woman who reads up on the symptoms of Ovarian Cancer will push her doctors to take her situation seriously if she thinks she may have this devastating disease.

I love you all.

Denise