Unexpected complications

It has been a while since I have posted.  I think I am slowly improving, in spite of the hiccups along the way.  For starters, I had the great joy of being able to walk my niece to school last Friday.  It was just a few blocks, but I truly was not sure I could do it.  It was cold, a little hilly, but worth it.  Addie is just a sweetie.  Mom was baking cookies with Laria while Patrick and Mandy were at Mandy's doctor appointment.  Bless her heart, she is dealing the the BRCA 1 challenge so well.  She doesn't dwell on it.  She and I have important decisions to make down the road, because the threats are real, but we have to live now.  I went with her on her MRI/mammo appointments on Monday, she did so well.  So I will be praying for good news on the results and ask everyone to pray for her.

I was told yesterday that I have intermittent bowel obstructions, happy day.  I know it's kind of gross to talk about all this but my internal problems are not really going away.  This past Saturday I had another episode and got real sick, and I don't have the flu.  After reading up on the subject, the only real "cure" is surgery.  Intermittent bowel obstructions are when part of your intestines twist and block your body from moving nutrients etc through your tract.  I was reading that "IBO" is a complication of major abdominal surgery as well as appendectomies. 

So now I am wondering if I should go back to a more liquidy diet, drinking health shakes for dinner etc.  I have no idea how or if abdominal exercises help or hurt.  This is a structural problem, my netting is gone.  I was warned by my internist that this could happen, but had no idea if it really would.

So, anyway, not sure how I will deal with it because it seems like there's really nothing I can do other than surgery when it occurs.  It can be life threatening, so there's another looming black cloud hanging over my door.

The good news is that I think Paxil is helping some.  I don't have as many really bad worrisome thoughts as I used to.  The weather is slightly better, flowers and trees are in bloom.  We need to pull weeds and start on our garden.  There are good days to be had and I am still trying to hear God's calling.

The irony is that my latest "IBO" episode started at Church.  Two patrons were so helpful to me, so helpful.  Thank God I was able to drive myself home. 

I still believe there is a place for me in the capacity of an advocate, helping women and primary care physicians become more aware of the mixture of unassuming symptoms that combine in the form of deadly ovarian cancer.  There is nothing that can be done about the BRCA 1 mutation, but my cancer could and should have been identified earlier.  I have forgiven my doctors for ignoring my complaints, but still feel the need to "do something" about it.  Worrying about possible breast cancer is too much to confront at this time.

I'm starting to open my mind to possibilities, and hope that something comes to the surface.

My niece Shelby has her 10th birthday in a few weeks, along with Aunt Deb.  That's exciting.  Laria is coming back with Mandy sometime this week so grandma can teach her to paint.  How fun will that be? 

Oh, my insurance denied coverage of my breast MRI.  Just found that out a few days ago.  So, I'll deal with that when I get the bill from the cancer center.  Mildly frustrated in that I thought they were going to pre-authorize the procedure.  I guess I was supposed to do that.  Maybe they will give me a discount.  If not, then I should look into the Susan G. Koman foundation, I think they have financial resources to help women with BRCA 1mutation pay for their MRIs.  To be honest, I am just so grateful that I had the MRI.  It will work itself out I hope.

Bye for now.