Voc Rehab update

Hi there.  I had two voc rehab appointments this week. 

On MONDAY, I met with the rehabilitation sciences counselor, and she gave me some homework to revise my resume.  She was hoping to facilitate a meeting with myself and the manager of a horticulture center, but that isn't really working out time and distance-wise.

The good news is that she will now be able to speak directly with the state DVR rep,  because I signed a release for her.  She is so nice and sincerely wants to help me.

TODAY I finished most of my aptitude testing at the other Seattle location.  The state DVR rep contracted an outside agencey to administer all kinds of testing to see "where I'm at".  Needless to say I felt like a total failure today.  My niece is probably smarter than me by now (she's gifted and was probably smarter than me at age 3)  Anyway, I had to complete a series of timed math, reasoning, spatial, and association tests.

The environment wasn't great because a lot of people were talking and I had a hard time focusing on algebra.

I guess I could have cheated and practiced math ahead of time, but I really wanted my results to be pure.

I mean, I NEVER had incomplete on my standardized test scores!  EVER.  I had good testing results as a kid out of high school.  Not a genius, but definitely above average.

Now, after chemo, processing things takes more time.  I forget names, faces, events, etc so easily.

She tried to make me feel better by saying "hardly anyone finishes the math one."  Ha.......In the past I would have finished.  I was a great student, took honors classes too...................sigh

I will be so totally depressed if the results come back that I've dipped in aptitude, in any area.

I just couldn't think fast enough, and got confused on the best approach to solving many of the problems in all the different testing areas.

I'll let you all know the results, I have nothing to hide.  I just don't want to look like a dummy on paper.

I need to take one more test and then she has a special interview for us to complete.

After that, she will run all the tests together for scoring and analysis, and formulate formal recommendations to me.  I am going to ask for copies of all results though, for sure.

No matter what the outcome, after the testing is done, I am going to make a special effort to improve my mental skills somehow.

I've never been a 'less than optimum" student...................never.  This is actually really scary.

I hope I'm overthinking this and that the actual results won't be that bad.

I wonder if I can use this to get my student loans pardoned....HA

Peace